Afraid of Resolutions

I wanted to make some resolutions this year but I was too afraid that I would not keep them, so I did not write them down. Instead, I wrote down all the things that are preventing me from making firm decisions to do or not to do something.

One of the main thing that prevented me from not exercising last year was my comfortable bed; I just could not wake up at 5 am to run up and down my 7th floor apartment stairs as I had planned. Last night, I slept on my couch, more light comes into my living and I am closer to my elevator so I hear every ‘ping’ made by my ‘early bird’ neighbors. I got up this morning and made the run-walk three times down, three times up (my goal was five but at least I got up).

I have always wanted to start saving, I mean really saving, but my life seemed filled with emergencies and I really love food. I have a serious obsession with Chipotle; I have the craving of a pregnant woman where I am scratching and it feels like my absent fetus is scraping relentlessly at the walls of my stomach until I buy a bowl. I bought myself some limes and have started sprinkling it on almost everything I eat. It’s day 12 into the New Year and I haven’t eaten out or purchased anything since I did my budgeted supermarket shopping.

I can never seem to start or even finish reading a book. I fall asleep or just lose interest. I started a workshop on January 7th and was assigned four workbooks, today I am reading ‘NO EXCUSES’ and honestly I realize that all along I really had ‘NO EXCUSES’. I am reading until late at night and want to read again as soon as I wake up in the morning.

I have always wanted to create a bucket list; actually it would not be a list but a word, TRAVEL. The main thing that has prevented me from accomplishing my ‘Bucket Worded life’ is money. Bad spending habits and my weakness to be self-disciplined are my biggest threats. I am now searching through all the things I really needed when I bought them and never really used so I can sell them; and researching how to travel for a minimum amount or even free.

12 days in and I am teaching myself discipline; slowly accepting the uncomfortable changes because I do not want all the things that were preventing me from making previous resolutions; to stop me from dismissing all the preventing things.



2 Comments Add yours

  1. drewkiercey says:

    Big up on your New Year’s resolutions on your bucket list! You have to start somewhere and just keep on moving sometimes.


    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you and all the best to you for 2017


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